You are HEALED!

     I talk to God in my car.  I'm not very good about getting on my knees and praying, and I spend a couple of hours in my car every week day on my way to and from work, so I figure it's a good time to have a conversation with God.  It feels more natural to have a conversation, say thank you for the beautiful day, for the job that I have, for the good things in my life and the good things to come.  It's easier to have a daily practice that fits into a time when I'm just listening to the radio or an audiobook or talk radio anyway.  Those things are, for the most part, background noise while I'm driving. So I have these conversations with God, which are sometimes just me talking to myself.
     Sometimes I get an idea that I need to talk about out loud.  I also find I am a kinder driver when I am imagining God sitting in the passenger seat.  I get less stressed about people cutting me off when God is sitting there with me. (Laugh if you want, it works for me.  YMMV)
     So, something I had heard in my travels was the idea that God could heal me completely, including healing me of my addictions and my alcohol abuse.  Now, I believe in a God of miracles, so yes, I believe God can heal me.  What I don't know is what does that healing look like?
     Seriously, what does being healed of your addictions look like?  Does it mean you no longer crave the drugs or alcohol or whatever else you are addicted to?  Does it mean you can safely take a drink again without fear of the obsession taking control again?  Does it mean that the mental obsession is lifted, never to return? I don't know what being "cured" or "healed" means.
     For me, I am healed every single day.  I don't obsess about drinking or drugging.  I don't take alcohol or drugs into my body anymore. I not only don't do these things, I don't even think about it.  The obsession is lifted, one day at a time. Just because I am healed today, doesn't mean I want to injure myself again.
     It's like this: If I dropped an axe on my foot and lost my toes, and was taken to the hospital and they were not able to re-attach my toes, I would be injured.  If God performed a miracle and my toes grew back (don't laugh, I'm talking miracles here!) everyone would see that I was healed and a miracle had happened. Does that mean I should not worry about dropping an axe on my foot again?  Should I continue to wear sandals when chopping firewood? NO! It means that God has performed a miracle of healing, and I am made whole again.  God also gave me the brains to realize that if I were to wear sandals while chopping firewood, I might hurt myself again. Now, some people would argue that maybe God would protect me from hurting myself like that.  My answer is that yes, God does protect me - he gave me the smarts to understand that wearing sandals while chopping wood is not safe for me to do, and I need to wear the steel toed boots instead.
     The other part of this discussion is that I have a disease that likes to tell me that I don't have a disease at all. So, when someone tries to tell me that God can completely heal me of my disease, I believe them - but I doubt I will ever believe I can safely drink alcohol ever again.  Fortunately for me, I also believe God doesn't want me to drink again, doesn't want me to injure myself again.  Even if God were to appear to me in a burning bush and tell me "You may drink alcohol with impunity!  You are now a NORMAL person!"  I'd say, "Great!  Do I have to drink? Is it required?"
    It would literally take that kind of miraculous appearance for me to believe I am normal and can drink with impunity. In the meantime, I'll take my daily reprieve, be grateful I am not obsessing about drinking or drugging today, and keep talking to God in my passenger seat.